It can be difficult to set limits in the family, Because there is a popular belief that it is a basic pillar of any individual. But this is not always the case. A A toxic relationship is one that makes you feel bad, creates feelings of anguish, and even affects your self-esteem., Which can also happen to any of your relatives.
or it might not be so radical definitely break upBut you need less control or more space, either with your parents or with that tantrum-ridden sibling or bully.
Whatever the issues, it is time to accept that this is not a healthy relationship and that you do not need anyone’s approval.
Signs That May Indicate You Have an Addiction to Toxic Relationships and How to End This Addiction
since psychology today Author, medical consultant, and pain psychologist Rachel Zoffnes lists a few. Simple guidelines for creating boundaries with your family if you think so.
Start by evaluating yourself and your time
The relationships you make, whether family or otherwise, should make you feel good. so if you think so someone doesn’t value you, respect you or generally make you feel bad Ask yourself if it’s worth spending time with that person.
for Create Boundaries With Difficult Relatives The first thing to do is to start valuing yourself. What else do you need? And don’t be afraid to get it.
actively choose Surround yourself with people who build you up instead of tearing you down, Imagine what your life would be like if you spent time exclusively with people who love and value you?” Zoffnes advises.
let yourself do what’s best for you
Cultural norms may mean that you should spend time with family, and that if you don’t, something is “wrong” with you.
However, in expert opinion, in order to stay healthy, you must keep aside the stigma and stereotypes. Accept that this is not a healthy relationship, and know that you do not need anyone’s approval.
“Is it important have healthy boundaries Whether others understand and accept them or not. Reducing time with toxic people is an act of self-love. There’s no shame in this game.”
Be clear about your needs and state them
In the words of Zoffnes you should Know your needs and limitations in advance. Trust yourself and be honest when it comes to knowing what you want.
Maybe you don’t want your mother-in-law to spend as much time at home as possible, or maybe you want to spend part of the holiday with friends instead of family. as a last resort, You may decide that you do not want to be in a relationship with an abusive family member any longer. “And while it can be very painful, it’s also okay,” says the psychologist.
Once you identify your limits, state them clearly and kindly.
Know the triggers to be able to anticipate the problem
Whether it is an overly controlling parent or a sibling who belittles all your achievements, you always need to rise above. One step ahead of the triggering factors of conflict.
According to Zoffnes the following steps are involved in achieving this: Identify them, learn what emotions they generate, how to best manage them and plan how to respond once they are triggered.
“Being prepared for a stressful situation can make it less stressful.”
practice saying “no”
Starting to say “no” can change your life for the better. But it is not always easy to put into practice for fear of disappointment.
Although ,set limits Not only does it make you feel stronger because you’re standing up for yourself, but it also lets others know that you know your needs and aren’t afraid to express them.”
To put this into practice, create a “menu” that ranges from a soft “no” to the most resonant and practice so they become familiar and instinctive. Then start using them with the family, advises the expert.
Make a list of strategies to overcome bad times
make a list of Strategies to help you overcome anxiety before a triggering event.
These can include, according to the psychologist, going for a walk, taking a warm bath, listening to relaxing music, meeting a friend to blow off steam, spending time alone, reading… anything you feel will help.
And use it to make you feel better when you need it.