Brussels — The sound of a phone ringing in a quiet room used to hold a kind of magic. It was the call of someone reaching out, pulling you into a conversation that mattered. But somewhere along the way, for many young adults, that magic has turned into an irritation—a sound that feels like an interruption, a disruption of personal space.
Vanessa Villazán, 32, admits it’s been more than a month since she picked up her phone to answer a call. “If it’s important, they’ll text me,” she says, shrugging off the notion that phone calls have any place in her busy life. Her words reflect a shift, one felt deeply by millennials and Gen Z, whose relationships with their phones—and with the people who use them—have changed dramatically. It’s not just a preference; it’s a fundamental shift in how they communicate and how they protect their time.
Why Phone Calls Feel Like an Invasion
For generations before, a phone call symbolized connection, a bridge between two people, no matter the distance. But today, for many young adults, it feels more like an uninvited guest. There’s no warning, no way to prepare for the conversation that will follow. It’s this sense of being caught off-guard that leads people like Isaac Rodríguez, 26, to feel stressed at the mere thought of answering the phone.
“When someone calls, there’s no time to think about what to say. You can’t edit your words like you can with a text message,” Isaac explains. “It’s instant, and that’s where the anxiety kicks in. I’d rather text—I can be thoughtful, deliberate. I don’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing.”
It’s a sentiment echoed by a growing number of millennials and Gen Z individuals. A recent study from the University of Murdoch found that over 80% of participants feel anxiety when receiving unexpected calls, particularly from unknown numbers. The ringing of a phone now triggers stress, a sense of urgency that these generations would rather avoid.
The Evolution of Mobile Devices and Communication
The way we use our phones has evolved beyond recognition in just a few short decades. Once, mobile phones were for calls and little else. Today, they’re cameras, calendars, entertainment hubs, and digital diaries. For Cristóbal Benavides, dean of the Faculty of Communication at the University of the Andes, this change is more than just a shift in technology—it’s a transformation in the very fabric of how we interact.
“The basic function of a phone isn’t to make calls anymore,” Benavides explains. “For millennials and Gen Z, it’s a tool for doing a thousand other things. Texting, browsing, taking pictures—all of these have taken priority over talking.”
The convenience of sending a quick message—something that can be read and replied to when it’s most convenient—has displaced the need for real-time conversation. In a world where multitasking reigns supreme, text messages are asynchronous, allowing communication without disrupting the flow of the day.
Texting: Reflection of Control and Efficiency
But beyond convenience, the preference for texting over calling reflects something deeper: control. Texting allows individuals to set the pace of the conversation, to respond on their own time, and to think before hitting send. It’s a level of control that simply doesn’t exist with a phone call, which demands an immediate response.
This is particularly important in professional settings, where millennials and Gen Z are redefining workplace communication norms. “In my job,” Vanessa says, “I don’t have time to stop everything to answer a call. It’s disruptive. A text lets me decide when I’m ready to engage.”
And it’s not just about work-life balance. Research from Bank My Cell shows that 75% of millennials intentionally avoid phone calls, finding them inefficient compared to the ease of a text message. Calling, to them, feels like a demand for attention they might not be ready to give.
Anxiety, Privacy, and The Unspoken Impact of the Unexpected
There’s also an emotional layer to this shift. For many, answering a call feels like walking into a conversation blindfolded—unprepared and vulnerable. Studies show that millennials and Gen Z view unexpected calls as an invasion of privacy, a jarring interruption in a world that thrives on scheduled interactions.
The act of receiving a call from an unknown number can even trigger anxiety, with participants in the University of Murdoch study admitting they often fear the worst. An unexpected call could mean bad news, an uncomfortable conversation, or an unwanted confrontation. “Every time my phone rings, I think—what’s gone wrong now?” Isaac confesses. It’s this kind of emotional weight that pushes many to send the call to voicemail and follow up with a message instead.
Generational Tensions: Baby Boomers vs Millennials and Gen Z
While texting has become the norm for younger generations, the contrast with older generations—particularly baby boomers—is stark. For boomers, who grew up with landlines and voice conversations as their primary form of communication, the idea of texting can feel impersonal, cold even.
Dominique Karahanian, a psychologist at the University Mayor, calls this divide “generational friction.” “Older generations see phone calls as a way of connecting emotionally,” she explains. “But for younger people, it’s the opposite. Calls feel invasive, while texting feels like a more respectful form of communication, giving the other person time to respond.”
This friction extends beyond personal relationships and into the workplace. Millennials and Gen Z may prefer to handle business over email or messaging apps, while older colleagues expect a phone call. Without understanding these differences, tensions can arise, making it crucial for workplaces to establish clear communication guidelines.
Finding Balance: The Need for Flexibility in Communication
The shift towards texting doesn’t necessarily mean that phone calls are dead. There are still moments where a call can provide clarity or emotional connection that a text simply can’t. But for the younger generations, flexibility is key. They value the ability to choose the mode of communication that suits their needs at any given moment.
To bridge the gap, Karahanian suggests empathy. “It’s important for younger generations to understand the emotional significance of a phone call to their elders,” she says. “At the same time, older generations need to recognize that digital communication is simply how millennials and Gen Z express themselves.”
As with any shift, adaptation is necessary on both sides. And perhaps, through empathy and understanding, the ringing of a phone will feel a little less intrusive and a little more like what it once was—a way of truly connecting.
Conclusion (Reflective Call to Action)
Communication has always been about connection, about reaching out and feeling understood. For millennials and Gen Z, that connection just happens to be in the form of a text message more often than not. And yet, perhaps there’s room for both. There’s value in the pause a text allows, the space to think, to craft a response with care. But there’s also a kind of magic in a phone call—a moment where two people are truly present, where silence isn’t awkward but rather a space to breathe and understand.
In the end, it’s not about choosing one over the other. It’s about recognizing that different moments call for different modes of communication. Sometimes, a message will do. Other times, it’s worth picking up the phone.
