New details from Will SmithThe upcoming memoir sheds light on a horrific childhood experience that made the actor think about killing his own father.
September GQ made a profile of the 53-year-old King Richard star that touches on a moment of violence that Smith recounts in his book Will (due out on Tuesday). According to the magazine, Smith writes that he witnessed his father hitting his mother in the head. Smith, who was 9 at the time, was shocked by the violence and froze to death, and his failure to intervene in his mom’s defense made the actor feel like a coward for most of his life, GQ told GQ about the flashback in the book. … The magazine then highlighted how Smith said it affected him and called his career accomplishments retribution or “a thin line of apologies.”“Mothers for inaction that day.
Now, in new and fuller excerpts from Will, recently published by People and ET Canada, goes into more detail about Smith’s experience with his father, who died in 2016, and his impact on him.
In passages, Smith writes that his father hit his mother “so hard she fainted” and that he “saw her spit blood.”
He also writes that despite maintaining a close relationship with his father, when his father developed cancer decades later and Smith cared for him, the actor felt his seething childish anger bubble up.
“One night when I was rolling gracefully [my father] from his bedroom to the bathroom, darkness arose in me, ”writes Smith. “The path between the two rooms runs past the top of the stairs. As a child, I always told myself that one day I would avenge my mother. That when I’m big enough, when I’m strong enough, when I’m no longer a coward, I’ll kill him. ”
He continues: “I stopped at the top of the stairs. I could push him and get away with it easily. ”
“I’m Will Smith. No one will ever believe that I killed my father on purpose. I am one of the best actors in the world. My 911 call will be Oscar-level.
Smith also writes that this impulse was fleeting.
“As the decades of pain, anger and resentment wore on and then receded, I shook my head and took Daddio to the bathroom,” he writes.
Smith also speaks openly about the difficult relationship he had with his father in recently published excerpts, and he describes him as “violent,” but “also at every play, play, and concert.”
“He was an alcoholic but was sober at every premiere of every one of my films,” Smith wrote.
Ultimately, Smith characterizes his father as “one of the greatest blessings of my life, and also one of the greatest sources of my pain.”